16 Terrible Dad Jokes You Will Secretly Love
Short puns with maximum groan per word.
Terrible dad jokes work because everybody knows they are terrible, including the person telling them. Share these when you want the reaction more than the laugh.
What do you call a book that floats?
A title wave.
What’s the least-spoken language?
Sign language.
What do you call an umbrella that won’t open?
Unstoppabrella!
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener!
Why do cats always land on their feet?
Because they have cat-titude!
What do you call a French guy in sandals?
Philippe Philoppe.
What’s a bad guy flying a plane called?
Condescending.
How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
Three. The left ear, the right ear, and the final front-ear.
Why didn’t Han Solo like his steak?
It was too Chewie.
What’s a boomerang that won’t return?
A stick.
What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?
They’re both Paris sites.
Why don’t pirates take a bath before they walk the plank?
They just wash up on shore.
Why do dads take extra socks golfing?
In case they get a hole in one!
What do you call a fancy fish called?
So-fish-ticated.
Why don’t scientists trust stairs?
Because they’re always up to something!
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick!
Got a joke that belongs on this list? Send it to info@millionjokes.com. We review every submission and only publish jokes that are clean and family-friendly. Browse more in Dad Jokes.
