You are here

The Law of Diminishing Returns

Rated: 
PG

A man went to a doctor, and said he wanted to be able to get a job at the local Post Office, but unfortunately he was too smart. The doctor asked him his IQ, and when he gave a three-digit reply, the doctor told him that the procedure would have to involve the removal of over half of his brain.

The man insisted, and since the doctor just happened to have a brand new laser device which could zap just the right portions of brain tissue, the operation was planned.

The laser was hooked up to a computer which could monitor the man's declining IQ on a nice bright LED display. The doctor threw the switch and the numbers began ticking off ... 95, 94, 93, ...

Suddenly the phone rang. It was the doctor's wife. They gabbed for a few minutes, the doctor forgetting completely about his patient.

When he hung up, he suddenly realized, and ran into the operating room, only to see the meter tick down ... 6, 5, 4, ...

He ran to the machine and threw the on/off switch, just as the laser was about to wipe out the last remnant of brain. "Holy moley!" exclaimed the doctor, "What have I done? Speak to me. Say anything!" The man looked at him and said, "I, George W. Bush, announce my candidacy for President of the United States..."